CarizzCruzem

For the last two weeks, I've been busy. I didn't have time to go to OJT. And to top it all off, I'm not even sure if I'll graduate this coming April though I worked my ass off. It's because of pre-defense which was scheduled yesterday, the last day of Prefinal-Examination.

This whole week was filled with times in front of the computer... my computer, school's computer, my other classmates' computer... and I bring my flash memory with me so I could sneak in a "session of debugging" whenever and wherever situation permitted me to do so. Yeah, debug... debug... debug.

And, the thing is, I got rid of bugs only yesterday... yeah, yeah, I'm that bad a student! Then I tried to save it to a diskette, only to find out that it exceeded diskette capacity. I tried to save it to the flash memory, but no, the flash memory was bewitched. It couldn't be detected. So I had to buy a cd and burn my program. Hmmm... oh well...

In the pre-defense room, I was quite nervous and quiet. I kept thinking that I overlooked a bug and the whole thing wouldn't work at all. Then I overheard a panel remarked about some "landslide". I couldn't help but ask what happened. Yeah, I'm that snoopy a girl... errr a lady... errr a woman? Whatever!

It shocked me, but the pre-defense got the better of me. It was alright. I didn't cry. Everyone was smiling. The program needs minor adjustments and some additions. I am content...

When I got home, I just slept. I didn't even eat. And then while sleeping, I remembered that I didn't eat the whole day yesterday. Oh well, I could hear my stomach grumbling now.

Then this morning, the reality of what happened in Leyte sets in. I searched for the words "Philippines+mudslide" and websites from giant news network popped up.

Ultra stampede and then this. The stampede didn't get as much as attention from all over the world, but this one did. I even found an Irish news network that has an article about the mudslide.

Well today is Sunday... and my dad kept asking me to bathe already because we'll be late for church. I will write more later... if God permits it that I'm still alive and well...

[Update]

What happened there was terrible. They said the reason behind the mudslide was deforestation. Few trees hold the earth. So whose fault was that?

The reason I'm ranting about that mudslide is the child I saw in the photo--one of the victims. Children move me the most. It pains me to see children hurting. It seemed an unjust affair for them to be included in this dire setting.

When I realized, or almost feel, what these people are facing right now, I feel ashamed of my actions these past few days. I've been cranky the whole two weeks that passed. I still think I don't deserve to be treated the way they did. But, hey, my life isn't in danger. I know I said I wanted to end everything. But when I think about it, one question pervades my thought process, "Am I ready to face my eternity?" I doubt...

I just hope... hmmm... well I wish things are better.

They're not though... so... hmmm...